Psychology

Why Finding the Right Language for our Emotions is Important

Connection is the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued. - Brené Brown. It's easy to act on our impulses and decide based on anger or fear. But often times these reactions harm our connection to others. The more we learn to slow down and allow ourselves to feel our bodies' emotions and communicate them, the more we can create long-lasting success in our professional and personal lives.
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1. Recognize What You are Feeling 

It's essential to make friends with every emotion that might come up. For example, it can help to remember how we feel when we touch a beloved pet or receive a hug from our partner. This feeling of soft and curious energy is the same feeling we want to develop for emotions we label as less pleasant experiences. And then to ask ourselves: What am I feeling in my body?

Most of the time, the first thing we recognize is a physical symptom in our body. It could be a stiff neck or lower back pain. Then, it's important to respond with empathy and warmth. To acknowledge the sensation and to promise ourselves to take care of it. This alone calms down our nervous system and helps us to relax further.

Then we can slow down even more and learn to be still. To wait for what other emotions might come up. Sometimes a stiff nick is only the first layer, and the real reason for our feeling of panic is that we feel lonely. 

The more we practice being in the moment and finding what we feel, the easier it becomes. The key is to always respond with warmth and empathy. 

2. Define What You Need

By asking: What is it that I need? We can learn to speak your needs. Usually, the need is a short sentence like: I want to feel connected. 

 

3. Speak Your Needs (If Necessary)

Sometimes we can take care of our needs by ourselves. For example, making ourselves a cup of tea or booking a message; other times, we need the support of others. By speaking our needs in a non-confidential way: "I feel..." We allow others to support us. 

When we allow ourselves to feel everything, we open the space for others to do the same. As a result, we can actively listen to the people closest to us and give them the gift of feeling seen, heard and valued. 

The simple act of pausing and allowing ourselves to feel can create deeper connections and, therefore, success in our entire lives. 

 

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